• PBWN

Make Space For.. a Slow Shimmy




How many sizes of clothes or versions of you do you have in your closet?


Be honest! I have three: unhealthy skinny (AKA, after the loss of my dad and I just didn’t eat), healthy skinny (aka, my best bod years), and my new middle age size. How about you? Do you hang onto things that just don’t fit any more, hoping like me, that you will one day fit back into that beautiful dress or skinny jeans again?


We all have things we hang onto. And that includes habits, not just clothes. One of my dirty little secrets and skeletons in my closet is that I have limiting, unproductive thoughts and beliefs. Oh yeah, a whole bunch of them. Like a cluttered closet with clothes I can no longer wear, I have lots of destructive little lies that hold me back and take up needed brain space to move forward in my career and life. Just today I confessed this to a friend and her text response was, “Wow, I so would never have guessed that about you. You have a very positive disposition, but I totally get that what presents on the outside is not always a reflection of what’s going on, on the inside.”


She was so right! My Insta and FB posts aren’t inauthentic, but they aren’t the whole truth.

So, I’m learning to retrain my brain. To “demolish arguments and every stronghold that sets

itself up against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to the obedience of

Christ,” (2 Corinthians 10:5).


Did you know a stronghold is a simple, child-like thought that is powerful and destructive? Yeah!


A stronghold lie is set up to destroy you and hold you back from fulfilling your purpose and

destiny. Girlfriend, our subconscious minds don’t have room for such things, especially because of how destructive they are. But to make space for the new, better, and more productive thoughts, we must toss out the old ones. There isn’t enough space for both to co-exist.


One of my more recent unproductive thoughts was regarding changes I want to make in order to increase my side hustle to a main hustle: “I have to do it ALL, and I have to do it NOW!” Even reading this my chest gets tight and I find myself practicing breathing exercises to calm myself down. Fortunately, I had a coaching call last week that changed EVERYTHING, and was super powerful for me. My coach said change is more like a slow shimmy than a big leap.


Did you catch that?


Big leaps rarely work. Often, they set us up for failure. A slow shimmy however, are those small incremental changes that make big differences over time. We may not have the bandwidth to make a 100% all-in change, but we can make several small 1% changes that get us toward that goal. Let me share two examples:


As I shared, I grew a couple of clothes sizes this last year; thank you peri-menopausal hormone changes. I could totally go all-in on the Keto diet, have Keto flu, and potentially out of frustration give up before I see any results; instead, I decided to eliminate some things slowly and then when I go all-in, I am ready and can make a longer-term sustainable change. So, I gave up gluten: bread, pasta, etc. I also gave up desserts. Two small changes, but I still keep my mashed potatoes, for now. My next 1% change is subscribing to a Keto pre-made meal delivery plan to help save time and make it easier for me to transition without a whole lot of thought. Small, very doable changes. A great way to shimmy toward my BFAG (Big Fat Audacious Goal) to lose 23 pounds.


The other place I am making a slow shimmy 1% change is growing my side hustle. Applying the dress for the job you want, not the job you have approach, I have a lot of self-talk that needs to change. So, I ordered business cards and a coffee mug, which may not sound like much, but it’s a 1% change that moves me closer to eating the whole elephant.


I don’t know what you need to make space for in your brain, but maybe you would like to slow shimmy with me. Comment below on the one destructive little lie that you want to remove and the 1% change that removing that lie will make room for.


Let’s shimmy together!


--Jennifer Fonseca

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